I want to begin this blogging adventure with a story that even caught me off guard and sure as hell made a good story afterwards. It was my girlfriends’ last night as an unmarried women and she had rented the executive suite at the a hotel in Vancouver. This suite was so nice Brad Pitt had stayed in it, it was luxury at its best. The night was suppose to be a girls night with wine, cheese... and strippers...did I say strippers? Oops. The girls all loved hanging out but we needed a big bang to end her last night as a single woman. We were all chatting and the idea came up to get two strippers; one black, one white. We called down to the concierge and asked if they could provide us with the info to get them, they told us they will see what they could do. My girlfriends sister in law managed to find a hotline for male strippers. The lady said they were 300.00 each, and love tips while they strip. We called down to the concierge and let them know that 2 guys by the name of Diamond and Daniel are coming and to let them up to our suite.
We got a knock at the door about an hour later, a white male walks in by the name of Daniel, dressed in a cops uniform and says that we all have been naughty girls and leads us outside to the terrace. He starts his show focusing on the bride to be, throwing her around, and putting her in the “titanic” sex position. Things start to get more and more revealing on his end so we go inside for some privacy, where there are large glass windows, so if you wanted to creep in, you easily could. At this point he’s fully naked and we all are having a good laugh. He finally stops after sweating up a storm and gets dressed. He tells us we are in for a big treat and leaves.
There’s another knock at the door, a tall, broad black man by the name of Diamond comes in with a bag and asks to use the washroom to get changed, I lead him to the washroom with a big tipsy smile. We all wait downstairs for a few minutes giggling, listening to dirty stripper beats and sipping a 2 6 of Bacardi to ease the tension. Diamond walks down the stairs in his police uniform with a baton and heads straight to the bride to be and picks her up. He continues on and starts grinding on the other girls one by one. Finally its my turn and he picks me up and straddles me, I definitely enjoyed being picked up by such a big dude. Finally he ends his show by sitting the bride to be in a chair while slapping his penis in her face- not actually but quite close. We all got a big glimpse of his package and how big it was-oh and let me tell you- it was big. Once his show was finished he was invited to the Terrace to have some food and drinks before he left. I don’t know why but I was strangely interested in this guy, I know I know, he’s a stripper.
It was time for the bridesmaids and bride to go to bed, and me to get going as I had a flight to catch in the morning. I asked how he was getting home and he said driving, and asked if me and my two friends needed a ride. We walked to his car, which was nice beemer, not bad my stripper friend not bad at all. I get in the front seat, and we start talking about how he’s a construction worker by day and a stripper at night. Well my house is about two blocks before my girlfriends house- so technically I should have got dropped off first, but I insisted that we drop my girlfriends off first. At this point he is definitely hitting on me, I must have been a little drunk because I’m pretty sure I was hitting on him back. I just knew that my girlfriends were killing themselves secretly with laughter, but I rolled with it anyways. He drops my two friends off first, and then heads to my house. At this point he asks me how I was getting to the airport in the morning, I told him transit and offered to give me a ride. Well like any of my friends would agree, anything free sounds like a splendid idea to me. I think I threw in a “Ill buy you Tim Hortons tooJ”. We ended up kissing in the car, his full lips were soft and supple. So I asked him if he wanted to stay at my house seeing how it would be easier for him, so he wouldn’t have to drive back and forth from his to mine in the morning.
Of course he agrees and I tell him I was having issues with my bed and that the bed boards cant hold weight, especially his. We drag the mattress off my bed and put it on the floor. He “strips” down to his tighty whities and hops on the mattress, I get on and we continue to talk and kiss. He then tells me that if we fuck I wont make be able to make it to airport because Ill be so tired after what he would do to me. I laugh! Ok well then, maybe its not the best idea and god knows if he would even fit in me or if I could walk again after that anyways.
I get woken up by my alarm going off and I open my blurry eyes and see a big black man in my bed, this was not the first time, but the other time the guy was gay. I woke him up and we quickly got ready and he couldn’t find his shirt, we were in a hurry so I gave him a white wife beater size small-he’s an XL, it was that or him leaves shirtless. We got in his car and we stopped at Tim Horton’s for breakfast, I buy him the biggest sandwich they had on the menu, we start driving again and he gets this phone call from an Asian lady and puts her on speaker, “hello, big banana - I love you long time”. I thought people were joking when they would make fun of Asian ladies saying lines like that, well I guess not, stereotypes are around for a reason. We finally get to the airport I give him my number, he calls me so I have his, we hug and he says call me when you get back!
So I took home a stripper. I never saved his number therefore I never called him and he never called me. You think guys don’t call you if they sleep with you, but this wasn’t the case. Whatever. It's a good story but I could never bring home a stripper or even admit to sleeping with one. A week later I found his shirt in my room and gave it to my brother! xxJ
